The Flying Rat

I'm convinced that there is a flying rat in our bedroom. Dustin however, refuses to believe that and assures me is it a moth. I still don't believe him.

Late last night I was sitting at the desk in our bedroom, the only light coming from the glow of the computer monitor since Dustin was trying to sleep. I was happily minding my own business, working on my soon-to-be best selling novel, when something zipped past my head. It was silent of course, but I caught site of it's large body as it bounced off the computer screen. I was thinking, Just your imagination Jess, you're tired.

Back to typing I went.

A minute or two later something straight out of a horror movie landed in my lap. And since I don't wear pants to bed, your welcome for that little tidbit of information, all I felt was a large, furry body on my thigh.

I froze.
It started to crawl up my leg.

I squealed and knocked it away, pulling off some inept dive move to jump into bed and landing on top of Dustin. Since he can fall asleep in a matter of seconds, he started moaning and grumbling, wondering why the heck I was jumping on top of him.

Me: There is an evil bug/rat thing over my the computer.

Dustin: What makes you think it is evil? Because this would be anyone's natural response.

Me: It tried to crawl up my shirt. I was whispering at this point in case the flying rat could hear us.

Dustin: Maybe it is just perverted.

After I smacked him once or twice he got out of bed and turned the light on. Nothing.

Me: I swear there is a flying rat over here. Notice this time I gave up on the bug theory.

Dustin: Or maybe just a moth?

Me: Doubt it

If you read my rabbit post, you know that we have a history with evil creatures.

I was standing close by his side during this, doing my own searching, when he thought it would be a great time to joke and start searching my hair for this flying rat. Not cool DMill, not cool. Eventually he turned off the light and crawled into bed. I followed, but chose to plant myself in the very center of the bed and clasp my arms around my legs. I was going to sit and watch for this flying rat, but alas, it never showed.

I finally laid down and told Dustin that if I woke up with a bug in my mouth it was his fault to which he responded. "Then don't sleep with your mouth open."

When Rabbits Attack

Last Thursday night around 11pm, we were all in bed. I was reading my Nook and Dustin was playing on his iPod. Suddenly we hear a bang in the basement. Naturally I tell Dustin to get the bat and I grab my phone to dial 911 but he stops me. We hear a second bang and curiosity gets the best of me. The bang came from the basement but near the egress window so I first went and turned on the back light and stuck my head out the door. There were a few rabbits hopping around out backyard so I wondered if maybe one got stuck.

I went down to the basement, 911 set on my phone still of course, and discover I was correct. Dustin comes down and sighs when he realizes that I am going to make him save the rabbit. He decides to open up the glass part of the egress window a bit but didn't anticipate that it would spook the rabbit. The rabbit went crazy, jumping everywhere, and landing against the window. Dustin yells "Jimminy Christmas!" and runs away yelling "It went for my juglar!"

So now I am on the basement floor crying I am laughing so hard. I tell him to go outside with a laundry basket and put it over the rabbit, and then we can slide cardboard underneath and lift it out to free it. Well the rabbit had leaned up against the wall by now so I opened the screen an inch or two to poke it with a stick. Well, Dustin is about a second from trapping it when it goes crazy AGAIN.

It pulls off some Harry Potter double decker bus move [or I don't have any bones move for non HP fans] and slips through the inch of window open. I am screaming my head off standing on a stack of drywall holding a broom. Dustin comes bursting out of the window and quickly shuts the door to the upstairs. He ran to the back of the basement because he was afraid it would get into the storage area and then we would never find it.

We finally got it cornered and somehow into a box. We then slid plexiglass to trap it, then wrapped it in 3 blankets and duct taped it. We took it upstairs, out the front door, and I hid inside while Dustin let it loose. It got cut somewhere so there is blood all over our basement and my blankets. Ugh.

When it was over Dustin goes "You are supposed to be Miss Steve Irwin, the animal lover, and there you are standing on a stack of drywall screaming like a little girl"

We decided it was like Tangled [pictured above] when she jumps on his back and he is like "Stay calm... it can probably smell fear"